“Take the first step in faith. You don’t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.”
Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

I recently came across a statement by author and performance coach Jack Canfield where he expanded on Dr.King’s quote:

“Think of a car driving through the night. The headlights only go a hundred to two hundred feet forward, and you can make it all the way from California to New York driving through the dark, because all you have to see is the next two hundred feet. And that’s how life tends to unfold before us.”

In 2011 my wife and I decided we were going to adventure our way through northern Thailand to find and attend one of the most elusive cultural festivals in the world: Yi Peng. If you’ve ever seen a travel guide or sales brochure with the picture of a night sky full of floating lanterns, that is Yi Peng. Like all great cultural festivals, Yi Peng has suffered commercialism and cheap tourist knock-offs of the celebration can be found all over Southeast Asia. But there is still only one authentic Lanna Yi Peng festival and it can be found in Chiang Mai, Thailand on the night of the first full moon of the second month (‘Yi Peng’) in the Lanna calendar (November in the western calendar). And for anyone with the patience and willingness to roam through a city that doesn’t speak English, following strangers who look at your guide book photo and point toward a barren dirt mound on the outskirts of town, Yi Peng is waiting for you.

Jack Canfield’s visual of a car driving in the dark is powerful because we’ve all had that experience. We were all afraid of night driving when we first started driving, and we all see it as second nature over time. That journey in 2011 was one of the most rewarding drives in the dark I’ve ever taken. Like Dr. King notes, no great achievement is easily visible from the starting point. Sometimes we have to trust that the next step will become visible only after we take the first step. That first step into the unknown, that blackness just beyond the headlights, is always the hardest.

When you get to Yi Peng, you will see hundreds of strangers gather on the mount with you. The sun sets and darkness collapses around you. Then one by one, small candles ignite and large paper lanterns are handed through the crowd. Families gather together to unfold their lanterns and light the candles that hang at the bottom. They speak their prayers and wishes for a good year out loud and believe they are filling the lantern with the same. And as the candle glows brighter and the hot air fills the lantern, everyone releases their hopes into the sky. And for a while, there is no more darkness. The lights of a thousand dreams blanket the hill and fend off the darkness. As the lanterns float higher and get caught in strong breezes, they are swiftly carried away together to higher altitudes and faraway places. The light fades away and the darkness returns.

What Yi Peng taught me was that we do not need to find lights in the dark before we move forward. Instead, we need to be the lights in the dark that carry our dreams higher.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail

At my college graduation, our keynote speaker was expected to speak for over 90 minutes! The graduation was outside in late May and the 800 graduating students were in full military dress uniform: heavy wool jackets with high collars, long wool trousers, starched shirts and shirt garters. If you don’t know what a shirt garter is, consider yourself lucky. It is a piece of elastic that connects your uniform shirt to your socks and must have been invented by a Nazi party fashionista.

I knew I wouldn’t be able to pay attention to some round-bellied politician pontificating for over an hour in the heat, so I decided to take a Nintendo Gameboy to graduation with me. Since there is nowhere to carry a Gameboy in dress uniform, I built a neck strap out of shoelaces and paperclips to carry it. Not very pretty, but it worked. And when the speaker got up to give his keynote, I popped open Yoshi World and went to a happier place for a while. If you’ve ever played Yoshi World, you know it’s a terrible game. But it was better than my reality right then and there.

By all measures, video games have ruled the entertainment world for the last 20 years.

  • In 2009, Black Ops grossed 300% more than Toy Story 3
  • In 2010, Avatar and Modern Warfare 2 shared the same opening week and Modern Warfare grossed 200% more than ticket sales for Avatar
  • In 2012, when the first Avengers move came out, the sequel to Black Ops outsold the blockbuster by $403m

 But why? Why are these games so popular, and more importantly, how can we learn from their success?

The answers can be found in 1988.

The top 2 video games in 1988 belonged to one system – Nintendo. Nintendo dominated the market and its highest selling games were sequels of previous hit games: Megaman 2 and Super Mario Bros. 3. Emerging companies like Sega and Namco were trying hard to break into Nintendo’s market. They created copycats of popular Nintendo games, merged with video game producers that previously partnered with Nintendo, and otherwise worked to block existing partners from reaching Nintendo. That was the way the world worked: copy the success of others, starve the competition, compete for a limited share.

Nintendo saw the hostility of the market and decided to explore a new idea; a new game that would break every rule in the video game world. At the time, it was believed that games had to be linear – built on a set storyline where memorized patterns and repetitive practice would allow everyone to beat the game. Anyone who has played Mario Bros., Tomb Raider or Metal Gear Solid knows what linear game-play feels like. Linear games were the rage and video-game publishers wanted to be in the game, so they did whatever it took to be players.

Amid all the infighting and conflict, Nintendo released their special project – the Legend of Zelda. Zelda was the first non-linear game ever produced and to this day is considered by gaming experts to be “The greatest, most influential game of all time.”

Zelda allowed players to explore an open world. The play was non-linear, meaning every individual player had a different experience. It was the first game where players could choose how to equip their character, save their progress, and complete side-quests in addition to the primary story. This variety allowed infinite options for gamers Every time you played the experience was unique. Where other games forced you to follow a set path, Zelda allowed you to write your own story. The legend was your own.

Video games are a powerful lens from which to consider life. Many people see life as a linear game; a predictable series of events that must be completed in a certain order before you can move to the next level. And even though we know the pattern and have seen others complete the story, we are not compelled to pay attention. So instead, we turn to video games. We turn to a non-linear world where anything is possible. But there is a secret out there that nobody talks about – a game cheat that very few realize and even fewer use: Our lives can be non-linear. We can be anything we want to be. We can build our own legend.

The world we live in today is not much different from that of 1988. Businesses are copying one another and mergers outnumber innovations, fighting for a limited share. We see new examples every day: Snapchat stories become Instragram stories; Instragram Live becomes Facebook Live; Uber begets Lyft begets Gett, Juno, and a host of other rideshare apps. The game is linear – predictable, repetitive and boring. The world needs people who are willing to change the game.

I hope I don’t disappointment anyone when I say, “video games can teach us.” They teach us determination, focus, commitment. They teach us how to struggle with frustration, how to collaborate with teammates, how to persevere and overcome. Parents, I encourage you to sit next your resident gamer and see how they rise to the challenge in a non-linear virtual world. See the confidence, intelligence and problem solving skills you instilled in them come alive on the screen. You will be awe-struck if you let yourself watch. The minds that can master these games are the minds that can change our world.

You men and women are a living legacy for your families. You represent a generation of college-bound students with the opportunity to shape history. University life, like all of life, can be linear or non-linear. You can do what others have done before you and compete for a limited share, or you can opt for a different adventure, challenge yourself, and create something incredible.

We live in an open world; a world where you can choose your equipment, save your progress, find allies and fight evil. Side-quests are everywhere and boss battles lie ahead. You deserve more than simple patterns and bonus lives. Recognize the infinite possibilities that lie before you. Don’t jump from goomba to goomba, hoping for fireballs, super mushrooms or invincibility stars. Instead, explore your world, discover your potential, and build your legend.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail

 

Some say spying is a gentleman’s game; it’s not. Leading news sources in the US and China confirmed this week that nearly two dozen CIA informants have been killed or imprisoned by Chinese authorities. When the only thing we can agree on is the body count, it may be time to re-evaluate our values.

The New York Times, BBC, Asia Times and more filled the newswire this week with reports that CIA informants in China were killed or captured as far back as 2010. Nobody seems to know how Chinese authorities were able to quickly and quietly identify, terminate and detain CIA’s most sensitive sources over the course of two years. The Agency claims they were investigating two possible moles – Chinese penetrations working inside CIA itself – but both suspects successfully fled to Asia before a case could leveled against them in the US. A second theory was that the operations were discovered due to human error; sloppy, repetitive tradecraft by CIA that the Chinese reverse engineered and used as virtual tracking beacons. While the ongoing discussion is interesting and compelling, the focus is on the wrong question. Rather than ask, “What happened?” I challenge that we ask, “Why did it happen?”

My time with CIA taught me that a country’s chief intelligence service is a reflection of its culture. That explains why the people serving in CIA Headquarters and executing covert operations are more like the cast of ‘The Office’ than ‘Burn Notice.’ They complain about their commute, compare predictions for ‘The Voice,’ and doze off daily in their cubicles around 2:30pm. This routine is not a sign of incompetence, but rather an indicator that CIA is more common than Hollywood would have us believe. This commonality is important because it is the key to understanding why CIA lost decades worth of work in less than 24 months.

The men and women serving at CIA are just like you and me: they love their families, take pride in their country, look forward to summer vacation and hate paying taxes. When they were first hired by CIA they accepted their job offers with excitement and optimism. But over time, like many of us, they discovered that their talents, ambition and creativity were not priorities for the company. Too often conformity, obedience and quiet restraint paved the road to promotion.

When the grind of a long commute, disinterested leadership, conflicting priorities and a fixed salary wear us down, compromise takes the driver’s seat. We compromise on goals, ambitions and even personal health. Is it a surprise, then, that we would see a compromise in professional performance as well?

Consider again the headlines from above. The New York Times credits, “current and former American officials…on condition of anonymity” as news sources. Each of these individuals signed a secrecy agreement to protect this type of information but chose to compromise themselves by leaking this story. The mole hunt was focused on disgruntled employees who were compromised even though they were once full of enthusiasm and commitment as new recruits. Lastly, Chinese intelligence services have countered our recent losses with their own operational victories like the cyber attack on the Office of Personnel Management in 2015, placing Chinese agents inside FBI in 2016, and penetrating the US State Department via American citizen Candace Marie Claiborne earlier this year.

The espionage problem is not about leaks or tradecraft, it is about compromise – the fatal flaw. Espionage is about selling lies to traitors who want to be patriots. Compromise begets compromise in a destructive cycle that devours our energy and convinces us that the only escape is to compromise further. Do not be fooled! Take heart – there is another way. We can reject compromise, embrace courage, and strike out in pursuit of the life we have always believed in. Those trapped in the vacuum of compromise will try to convince us that all is lost, but we must stand resolute. Live the example, recognize your potential, and fear no horizon. The horizon is the only place where we can meet the sun.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail
Photo Credit: Waterman Survival

 

Drowning is one of my greatest fears in life. Imagine my surprise when I learned in 2015 that the average human being can hold their breath for nearly two minutes naturally – without preparation, training, or risk of injury. With proper training, that number can increase by 50% – 100% or more! For me, that training started with the Waterman Survival Course under the guidance of Freedive International Instructor Joe Sheridan.

Drowning is something we can all relate to, even if we’ve never found ourselves pinned underwater with our lungs buckling for oxygen. Just this week I found myself standing in the safety of my own home, drowning in the tasks I felt piling on top of me. Miles away from the nearest body of water, I was immersed in the kind of panic, fear and confusion that must come with drowning in water. In that moment I thought of Joe and my time in his course. Humble, kind and helpful, Joe is a master of slowing the world down and maximizing every breath.

Static Apnea is defined by the International Association for Development of Apnea (AIDA) as the practice of holding one breath underwater for as long as possible. While many of us may not be able to imagine this skill being useful, professional watermen around the world would disagree. Big wave surfers often find themselves held under large waves, unable to swim to the surface for minutes at a time. Spear fishermen, freedivers, boat crews, and coast guard rescue swimmers are regularly put in a position where they are submerged without oxygen, slave to the power of the ocean. In those moments, a cool head and confidence in your capacity for apnea is the deciding factor between life and death.

Joe taught me how to interpret my body’s reaction to oxygen deprivation. I learned to differentiate between the feeling of too little oxygen and the feeling of too much carbon dioxide – two very different scenarios. With the first, you pass out and your body fails to function. With the second, your body may be uncomfortable but it remains fully functional. The value in this lesson transcends water safety and brings powerful truths to how we can live our lives.

When we feel overwhelmed by life – by the demands of work, school, personal goals or family – we can find confidence in knowing that we are far from drowning. The same two minutes that allow a pro surfer to find his way out from under a crushing wave also allow us to break free of the immediate anxiety we feel during life’s most stressful moments. When outside pressures reach their peak we can pause, trust our resilience, and know that the moment is temporary. The wave will pass over and our next breath will bring clarity. From there, we can find our way back to shore.

Drowning is preventable. Water is not the threat; fear and panic are the true villains that steal life. While Joe has given countless watermen confidence in their breath, I encourage all of us to let his teachings bring us peace of mind – in and out of the water.

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail

 

Espionage is predictable and ugly. Most people do not realize the repetitive nature of spying; that it is more akin to a child’s ‘color by numbers’ book than an Ian Fleming story line. Perhaps the predictability of espionage – the secrecy, the exclusivity, the winners and losers – is what makes it so interesting to people. While there may be mystery to the art of spying, there is also power in seeing the pattern. The same pattern used to pitch treason abroad is used by statesmen, salesmen and scammers to steal an important commodity from each of us: hope. But like most repetitive things, espionage is a game of diminishing returns played by people who yearn for the same changes that they fear.

The stage was set; we knew where the target would be, when he would be there, and we knew he would be alone. Our CIA lead officer was charged with making first contact. If the bump was a failure, only the lead officer’s face would be known and the rest of us could disperse unnoticed. But if the bump was a success, we were able to mobilize quickly to get cash, tech, or other support items to the lead officer at the wave of his hand.

Number 1: Contact
Espionage requires contact. Whether digital, physical, personal or impersonal, there can be no spying without contact. As a result of this requirement, spies have a different perspective on contact than the average person. An email can be exciting or suspicious; a cell phone equally convenient and risky; a relationship both a strength and a vulnerability. Over time, the constant uncertainty about contact makes spies paranoid and intensely focused on themselves – their safety, their career trajectory, their success. Yet still espionage attracts the passionate and intelligent like moths to a blue light, ignorant of fate ahead of them. Predictable, but ugly.

The operation was bare-bones; no tech, no radio, no weapons. It had to look like a casual exchange in a public setting. The target liked high-end items, things he couldn’t get in his own country, so we dressed our lead officer in finery – nothing too ostentatious, just enough to catch the eye of a narcissist. The goal was to make contact and drive for a simple exchange; a friendly conversation, a cup of coffee, maybe paying for an impromptu lunch. With the designer clothing and accessories worn by our officer, it would be easy to convince the target to let us pick up the tab.

Number 2: Exchange
Espionage requires exchange. The exchange can be anything: information, money, conversation, goods. What matters in espionage is that the exchange is unequal; that the target gives more than they receive, without realizing it. I have seen operations where foreign assets get paid in gold bars, powdered milk and even pornography in exchange for treason against their country. The unequal exchange is critical because it lays the foundation for dependence. Without dependence – some kind of perceived need – there can be no control, and every spy wants control over their asset. But control does not end at the operation. The truth is that spies themselves are also controlled; not by an individual but by the larger organization they serve. And like the target, spies are also fooled into giving more than they receive, without realizing it. Predictable, but ugly.

Success! We watched as our officer lead the target to a quiet coffee shop a block away from where they met. A quick and inconspicuous hand-gesture signaled that we needed to split-up and send one officer into the coffee shop with an envelope thick with money. A second officer would stage outside of the coffee shop and keep an eye out for anything suspicious. Our faces were still unknown to the target, shades of ‘the crowd’. To the target, it seemed like a lucky day where he met a friendly guy with deep pockets in line at the weekend market. To us, the plan was working perfectly.

Number 3: Compromise
Espionage requires compromise. An asset’s worth is a reflection of his or her immediate utility, and their utility is tied to their willingness to compromise. Telling secrets is not natural to anyone; even the biggest gossips refrain from divulging everything they know. While it is nearly impossible to get someone to change their personal values, it is surprisingly easy to get people to compromise on their values when they feel the situation is lucrative and private. This is the step where spies are born. Whether considering a foreign asset selling secrets for money, a terrorism suspect naming associates in exchange for a pardon, or a CIA officer sacrificing marriage, parenthood, and work/life balance, compromise is king in a kingdom of deceit. Predictable, but ugly.

I never saw the target in person again. I continued to track him from a distance, reading his progress on the road to espionage through reports that came in periodically. I saw the lead officer far more often, coming back to the office after meetings. He would come in, remove and return all the fine things he was wearing to impress the target, and walk home to an empty apartment in the same loafers and windbreaker he wore into the office that morning. This is espionage by the numbers.

The pattern is there for us to see. It is part of our daily lives. Contact, exchange and compromise have become pillars in our professional careers, peer networks and national politics. The question is whether we find ourselves giving more than we receive and compromising personal values without even realizing it.

By seeing the pattern we give ourselves the power to stop it; to break it; to change it. We do not need to fear the change – we need to drive it. If we do not drive the change ourselves than we hand control over to others; to those who see no value in positive change. From there the future becomes less hopeful and more predictable and ugly. But when each of us commits to driving positive change in our own lives we break the cycle that leads to compromise. It is at that point that we steer toward a new and better future for this generation and the generations to come. 

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail

 

Everyone is seeking the recipe for success. During an unexpected trip to Uruguay this week, a small-time chef with a five star smile shared his recipe with me.

Chef Luis didn’t teach me his secret in English or Spanish. He used the universal language of Paella. Paella is an ancient food, estimated to have originated circa 1000 years ago. Found in the Middle East, Europe, Africa and South America, Paella is made with a multitude of different ingredients unique to each region but with one common component – an over-sized frying pan known as the ‘patella’. When I crossed paths with Chef Luis at 10am in the riverside city of Colonia, he was pouring a 5 gallon bucket of seafood and vegetables into his patella. He smiled at me and my travel mate and told us, ‘Come back at 12:30pm – it will be ready.’

This post marks my last for the April Challenge series. Those participating in the challenge have shared trials, victories and frustrations along the way. Through it all, however, we find ourselves together now at the finish line! For some of us, we are excited that we met our original goal on time. For others, we discovered that there is power in allowing ourselves to adjust objectives midway without shame or embarrassment. And still more of us may choose to continue our April goal into May to see it to completion. Herein lies our ‘patella,’ the key universal component: growth happens during the journey, not at the destination.

Chef Luis was true to his word and at 12:30pm he handed us two small plates to sample his freshly made Paella. Gorgeous saffron-colored rice bursting with mussels, clams, squid, shrimp and fish commanded my full attention. The taste was exquisite; complex and hearty with flavors that sang of coastal waters and local farms. But the most amazing thing was that my tutor/chef had done it all without a recipe. The day’s catch, a few South American staples (corn, peppers, rice) and the steady hand of a committed cook were his script for success.

A goal, like a recipe, can be simultaneously comforting and intimidating. But like the best meals often come without a recipe, so too are the most impactful goals often borne from the heart. It is unheard of to discard a partially cooked meal because of a missing ingredient or an unexpected delay, yet we often justify abandoning our goals for exactly those reasons. Wherever you stand today with the April Challenge, know that you are the chef and the world will be inspired by your passion. Never stop cooking.

My sincerest thanks to Chef Luis of Restaurante Rio De La Plata!

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail

 

I was a covert intelligence officer for the US Central Intelligence Agency (CIA) living and operating under cover for nearly a decade. SPOILER ALERT – spying is not like you see in the movies. Yes, we get code names. Yes, we travel around the world on someone else’s dime. No, we do not drive nice cars. No, we do not get cutting-edge tech that fits inside a watch. But the most important thing to understand about spies is this – we are alone and we hate it.

In 2011 I was called to serve in a countersurveillance operation in a large metropolitan city in Asia. I was briefed only on the details I needed to know and given two pictures – one of the foreign agent and one of a fellow CIA officer traveling to meet the agent. My objective was to blend in with the crowd and keep a watchful eye from a distance for anyone taking a suspicious interest in the agent meeting.

Another difference from the movies is that spying is not glamorous. We do not wear bespoke suits and drink martinis while rubbing elbows with social elites. Spies are more like drug dealers, digging around in dark, dirty places selling treason to bad people. By virtue of the people we do business with, security is the top priority during operations. A spy that gets caught is an international incident. A spy that gets away lives to spy another day.

I tracked my targets on foot as they travelled through public venues engaged in hushed espionage. After nearly two hours, the two parted ways and I continued my look out to make sure neither was followed in their departure. Success – my mission was complete and I could start my own trip back home.

On that trip home I was struck by an urgent idea; I needed to leave CIA. Spies do not live in the real world. We operate in alias names, operate in cities where we do not live, and befriend people we do not like. Because of this parallel existence, spies only do what has to be done to maintain security rather than take risks to pursue great achievements. There are of course exceptions to the rule; the few outstanding officers who are selfless and uniquely dedicated in service to their country. But as with any other workplace, the few are not the norm.

I left CIA because I believed that ambition and passion would lead to a better life while security and secrecy would end only in loneliness. I believed that I needed genuine relationships to shape me into the person I was meant to be. Complacency is a slow infection – it robs us of creativity, passion and purpose and convinces us that we cannot be who we want to be; cannot do what we want to do; and cannot achieve what we want to achieve.

Just like popular movies glorify the life of spies, popular culture glorifies the life of those who ‘fit in.’ Both are works of fiction. Many of us live like spies, choosing to conceal our identity in order to blend in with the world around us. Rather than commit ourselves to great achievement, we instead do only what we must to maintain a sense of security while surrounded by people we do not like, engaged in work that does not challenge us. We justify our actions by calling them ‘responsible decisions,’ or ‘social obligations,’ or ‘necessary steps’. In the end, however – just like so many spies – we feel alone and we hate it.

Me.Now. invites all people living like spies to realize the possibilities of a deliberate life; to write a story for ourselves. Complacency is a perpetual foe that seeks to divide rather than unite. Like a spy, we are only alone for as long as we choose to stay in hiding. Once we choose to give up our cover and step into reality, we can find a community that enables us to achieve great things and a better future.    

Facebooktwittergoogle_plusredditlinkedinmail